My 10-4 writing record and thinking about writing as work

In late April, I let myself go a little crazy in the stationery section of McNally Jackson (Seaport). In addition to a notebook and a few stickers, I bought a Penco monthly memo pad with lines numbered 1-31. As soon as I saw it, I was filled with a desire to track what I wrote or what piece of writing I worked on each day in a month.

I love nothing more than a tracker, a way to tally my way through a period of time. Which, in itself, is kind of a win for me. I used to be the kind of perfectionist that would leave one line blank, one box unchecked, and immediately quit out of frustration and defeat. I’ve spent years learning that consistency works better for me if I’m a little less of a tightass. Anyway, I love filling a circle, checking a box, taking note of my accomplishments — even if some lines end up blank.

So far this month, my record is 10 writing days to 4 no-writing days.

One thing I have noticed is that on some days, I think about writing and I get to the end of the day and into the next and almost feel as if I did write because the task was present in my mind. But I’m not tallying time spent thinking about writing — an empty line is more black and white.

I do, for the record, believe that thinking about writing can be productive. My thinking about writing often occurs in a, “I need to sit down to write; maybe I’ll write this afternoon; maybe I’ll go to a coffee shop and get a few hours in; maybe I’ll write after dinner.” The thinking about writing usually feels more productive if I’m contemplating a particular piece or mulling over a particular point of tension. A spark of an idea occasionally comes while I’m journaling or playing a mindless video game, though I’m not a writer that swears by showers or walks as magical activities where ideas appear.

I‘ve also noticed that writing down my day’s writing accomplishments make me more conscious of whether I’m actually making progress on a piece or just flailing. I have a habit of shifting back and forth between a set of essays, not making huge strides on any of them. And since there’s only room to write one thing on the day’s line, it’s impossible for me to say, “I worked on X for ten minutes and then researched Y for a few minutes, and then wrote some notes for Z.” Giving the entirety of my focus to one thing at a time, one writing session at a time — it feels weird to me at times, but admittedly it’s working better.

All this to say, shoutout to Penco memo pads — I’m off to make it 11-4.